Tuesday, May 4, 2010

trying to find patience

another day down. today has been better than yesterday, but yesterday was rough. real rough. it's just a hard time for us and this week is so difficult leading up to mother's day. i think i have been dreading this day for months. i just wish we could skip it all together. i have the most wonderful mom in the world, but i can't get over not having wyatt here to celebrate with. there are so many people that have lost children, miscarried, or who long for a baby and haven't been able to get pregnant. i know that i am not alone in wanting this day to come and go. quickly. i know it stresses ryan out too. he is such an amazing husband and doesn't know what to do to make sunday less painful. but as we well know, there isn't a thing anyone can do....but just be there. i am so thankful to be married to such an amazing man who cares so much about our family. i love that he can still make me smile and laugh when i am feeling so defeated. i believe there is good in our future, it is just hard to see through the fog right now. i can't wait to look back and say "look at us now." i believe God has big plans for us....i'm just growing a little impatient ;) which really is no surprise....patience is not my strong point.

4 comments:

  1. Jessica, You have been on my heart and mind this week. You are a wonderful mother to your precious son!! Love to you. Katie Freeman

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  2. Jessica, thinking about you and praying for you everyday.
    Becca

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  3. I've been thinking about you so much this week. The anticipation leading up to Mother's day may be tougher than the day itself. I'm praying that you feel the love of our Father as he hears your cries and grieves with you.
    "When I was waiting quietly for the Lord, His heart was turned to me, and He gave ear to my cry." Psalms 40:1
    Love you!
    Jill

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  4. Hey Sis,
    Thank you and Ryan for allowing us to spend Mother's Day with you!! I loved getting to hang out with you guys. I wish we could carry you guys through this day and protect you from the pain and grief. I know we can't, but we here for you; loving, supporting, and praying for you.
    Sis, you are a remarkable sister, friend, and mom. Wyatt is so very lucky to have such a strong mom who loves the Lord with all her heart and has such strong faith. I know he is so proud of you and so thankful that God chose you to be his mom.
    I hope the rest of your day is filled with peace and you feel so loved. Love you guys!
    Love, your sis

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