mamie

over the past year i have mentioned mamie and her mom, sarah, several times. i am so blessed to have sarah as a friend. as most of you know, mamie was born sleeping just months before wyatt was born. while i certainly do not want to sound like i would EVER wish these circumstances on anyone...i am so thankful to have her in my life as we grieve the loss of our babies. it is not an easy road to travel and at times is very lonely. so i feel extremely blessed to have a friend to cry with, vent to, and who honestly just gets it. unfortunately, over the past two years, several of my friends have begun this journey with us. my heart breaks for each of us. it is a pain no one should have to endure. yet, i am so thankful for each of these women and i continue to thank God for placing them in my life. my life here on earth is richer because of them.


mamie's second birthday would have been this past saturday. which is why i posted the picture in the last post. sarah's sister had her friends send a picture of mamie's name to sarah's inbox on saturday as a surprise to sarah and her husband...what a special way to let them know we are thinking of mamie and celebrating her life. as you can only imagine, a mother who has lost her baby only hopes people will remember her child and acknowledge them as often as possible.


last year, sarah started a non-profit to honor mamie and bring healing to the hearts of parents who grieve the loss of a child. with the help of others and through donations she has supplied hospitals in little rock, hot springs, north little rock, and arkadelphia with plates to customize with the babies footprints. she has supplied them with a keepsake to cherish until they can again be with their child. i will tell you first hand, this is priceless.


i am ever so thrilled to tell you that we are beginning to provide plates to the hospitals in northewest arkansas. in fact, mercy and washington regional have both asked for plates and welcomed this gift into their hospitals. thank you! we are still in the process of trying to expand up here, but i wanted to share sarah's work with you. she has a website i will link you to...http://www.mamiespoppyplates.com/ there you will find sample plates and see the love sarah is sharing with other parents. thank you sweet friend for all are you are doing to honor mamie and other precious babies gone too soon.

happy birthday mamie

happy birthday Mamie! we love and miss you so very much! may our hearts be full as you celebrate in the arms of our Savior.

3 months

i get so sad that finley is growing so fast...but i LOVE each and every stage. she is such a sweet girl. she has really started smiling a lot and is making lots of noises. i also caught her trying to roll over the other day...i don't think it will be long. she better wait til i'm watching though :) mom doesn't want to miss A THING!

also, i have WONDERFUL news! my sweet friend, sarah, (mamie's mom) delivered burke last weekend! i am SO VERY happy for them. he is such a lucky man to have her and taylor for parents. i'm praising God that he is here healthy and safe. i also love how we can SEE God's hand in the safe delivery of this little guy....sarah delivered mamie stillborn at 37 1/2 weeks...so as you can only imagine, sarah has been a tad anxious about carrying burke over 37 weeks. i know fear was an issue while i carried finley...even though wyatt was full term...so i can't imagine the feelings sarah had while carrying burke. but burke came early! and sarah did not even have to face week 37. thank you GOD! you ALWAYS know just what we need...even when we don't.

and of course i had to post a few pictures...i hope she gets used to this...this poor girl is going to have her picture taken OFTEN :) oh how i LOVE her!

where we are now...

it's been a busy few weeks. good...but busy. we have spent a couple of weekends in little rock with our families and i have started wedding season :) it has all been so much fun. i love being 'back at work' (even if i do work from home. ha!) i just love being around people so i have quite enjoyed myself :) and then i have to say i SO enjoyed going to little rock to spend time with family. we even got to spend time with one of ryan's sisters and her kiddos...which was very very special. we just don't get to see them enough! finley was thrilled to meet her cousins! i'll have to load a picture of finley with her cousin caroline. it's on my phone right now...so i'll get on that :) caroline was so sweet to finley. she just loved to hold her and take care of her. i could have watched her love on finley all day. melts my heart!

today little bit is 12 weeks. i cannot believe it! she is growing so fast. i took her to the gym today...for the first time. i gave in and did it...i was so proud :) she was asleep when i went to get her so i'm thinking everything went smoothly and everyone was happy.

i just had to check in. and of course post a few pictures i snapped of her yesterday before we got ready for the day. she is wearing the outfit we took her home from the hospital in. don't be impressed...it's a little snug now and it swallowed her when we brought her home. but, to be completely honest i had forgotten about it (it was in the wrong section...i have her clothes organized by size) and i just happened to run across it yesterday and wanted to get some pictures of her in it. i love the owl! anyways, have a super day!

2 months

last sunday finley turned 2 months. wow how time flies! we had a few family pictures taken that weekend. and when i say family, i mean my mom, dad, sis, her munchkin, her husband, ryan, finley and i. my dear friend who shoots weddings with me agreed to take us on :) and i am so glad she did. i will cherish these days and memories forever. i can't help but smile when i look at the picture above. i think finley looks like a little doll. it cracks me up...those super round cheeks and all. i love it! what a sweet time.

finley has been doing wonderful. i am so proud of her. she has been sleeping through the night and we are working on afternoon naps now :) but that's my fault. starting at 6 weeks finley started sleeping about 6 hours at night. and then not long after, she has been sleeping about 9 hours! how lucky we are! i will not pretend this has anything to do with what great parents we are :) i think she just likes to sleep as much as her mom does..ha! so glad though! she also moved to her crib this past week. i know! i can't believe it! i finally gave in since she was sleeping so well. i feel like she is getting so big...so fast! and while i hate not having her so close all the time...i know this is good for all of us. i'll just keep telling myself that!

i swore i would never be 'that' mom with all of the schedules and such...but i am starting to see where this comes in handy. i certainly don't want to be too tied down every day, but a little routine never hurt anyone :) so we are working on getting down for regular afternoon naps...instead of napping in mom's arms. it's taking some time...but we are getting there. in fact, she is napping now :) i will admit, there has been a little screaming here and there, but everyday she goes does more peacefully and sleeps a tad longer. we'll call that success!

so basically, life has been very sweet. i am so thankful for these days and this time of our lives.

mother's day

again i have been trying to get on here, but i can't seem to figure out where the time goes :) well, we survived another mother's day. not really a big important holiday...but one that seems to remind you of what you don't have. really, i don't need reminding....i continue to think and miss him constantly. but i have to say, it was so nice to have finley here this year. she certainly brings so much joy into our lives and while i miss wyatt like crazy, i am so thankful for finley and her life. for the healing our Father has brought through her each and every day. she certainly brings life to us and i am forever thankful that HE blessed us with her. i am daily reminded what precious gifts children are. i pray i continue to realize this. both of our children mean the world to us. i so look forward to each and every day with our sweet girl. here's a picture from mother's day. we took it pretty easy...hence the lack of make up :) but i am determined to document all of my 'special' moments with this sweet little one. i continue to be reminded to take life one day at a time. to slow down and really take it in. enjoy each day...because it is a gift from above.

today...

i am so thankful. thankful for a God that allows me to take in one day at a time. i am so enjoying EVERY minute with finley. i have come to realize that healing comes everyday. it is not as though God has taken away the pain and sting of wyatt's death for good. He brings forth healing moment by moment. i continue to constantly think of wyatt. what he would look like, what he would be doing, how wonderful he would be as a big brother, what our home would look like with both of our children. these are all such painful questions. questions without answers here on earth. how grateful i am that the promise of eternity brings hope. that our our father made the ultimate sacrifice so that we may truly experience his love for us. i am so thankful. thankful for this beautiful day...for every breath i get to breathe here on earth with my loved ones. although i remain homesick for heaven and my little boy i know that we are blessed. that we are cared for and loved beyond measure. what more could i ask for?

"may the GOD of hope fill you

with all joy and peace as you trust in him,

so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit."

Romans 15:13